A Bit Disgruntled

So, let me tell you how this all started.  Mom was worried because I kept gnawing on my paws.  She is always pulling out twigs and burrs.  I guess that's why I keep getting clipped.  We live around trees and camp out in the forest.  What the heck does she expect? This time she had the groomer guy do the poodle thing with the paws.  Very sissie, and I'm still gnawing the tootsies.  

.....So what does mama do?  She takes me to the vet and tells all kinds of tales.  She even took in a poo sample.  How humiliating.  It is sometimes difficult to hold up my head in doggie society.  She says I'm scraping bottom.  Well.  Humph.  Some stuff is private.  I was so embarrassed.  

So what does the vet say?  She's thinking food allergies and Mom is going to put me on a diet of white rice and egg.  Heck.  I'm a dog.  I'm 16# and 10oz of handsome.  Rice and egg?  No more Blue Buffalo Wilderness?  What the heck.  I don't like the blueberries in it anyhow.