Sunday, October 2, 2011

RE: Henry's Future Wrestling Buddies....

#10

Concerned Parties:
There has been a break in the amazing case of the kidnapped wrestlers.  "Either the case is nearing the end," stated Derek Miller of Cassopolis MI, "or there has been a possible escalation based on a copy-cat kidnapper."  I'm thinking only time, and the kidnapper liaison Randall Sadler, will know for sure.  Mr. Miller continued, "It may take a DNA match to short this out. The time factor is an issue here."

#9

I have been assured that there will be a possible break in the case on Oct 16, 201111:31:37 PDT.

#8

There has been a possible break in the kidnapping case!  It will be a week or so until I can verify the information - but it appears that there is another site on the computer where the wrestlers are being ransomed off to the highest bidder.  

More later - but this really concerns me.

#7

We came home from Costco to discover Henry all in a dither.  Now you might say that for Henry, that is normal, but there was an edge to his dither that did not seem to have anything to do with the fact that he had, once again, escaped from his "cone of shame".  

I believe it was because of concern.  In our absence we had a call from one of the kidnappers with a message regarding the ransom.  Please play the tape and see if you can follow.  I think we may be in trouble.  I cannot find a secure source for that many dirhams - and so far, Greg's car has not sold to cover the rescue attempt.  

video


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For those of you who may have missed some part of this tense and grueling series, I've attempted to gather the more recent exchanges in the story. The above tape is, I believe, the most recent.  The following messages record the events as they have unfolded:

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#6

Message body

As Roger noted, there was no confirmation of a date or time in the pics, but I had my old CIA friends carefully analyze the radioactive signature of the photo, which was taken with an iPhone, and also recorded the coordinates and time/date. Based on this I can deduce:
1. Our friends are still alive
2.  They are still wearing the same clothing as when kidnapped
3.  Said clothes have not yet been laundered.
4.   I'm glad that photos do not yet include "smellovision."

R

#5

Date: Sat, 1 Oct 2011 11:14:03 -0700
From: sue
Rog, Randy, Greg, Steph and Sam,
Oh my gosh!  I didn't even think....I have searched the background of the photos and cannot find verification of a date or time.  Randy -- what do you think.  Is it possible that those incredible hunks of (whatever) are not still alive? I cannot stand the thought!
Sue



#4

From: Roger 
Sent: Saturday, October 1, 2011 11:06 AM
Subject: Wretched Wrestler Wranglers or WWW
Being the Super Sleuth of the So. Fork that I am, I believe I could be
of some assistance in tacking this/these dastardly despicable
dude(s)or dudeet(s). I'd feel a lot more confident if they had the
common courtesy and compassion to have shown a dated local news with
the captives. Without the date and not knowing if they have access to
a Transporter or a DeLorean, they could now be anywhere and possibly
lost for ever.
لا يأس هناك أمل دائما
Roger

#3  

Hi All,
I do want to help.  Those guys do have a hold on me.  But I don't know if selling the Carina could raise that much cash.  We may have to haggle.
Greg


#2  

Guys,
6 dirhams = $1.63 US  
I don't know how we can come up with that kind of money....wait, wait.  Greg could sell the Carina.  That should do it.
Sue

#1

FROM:Randall
TO: Family

       
Thursday, September 29, 2011 9:20 PM

Message body


I thought I'd better break the news to all of you at once.  Once again, the dastardly demons who made off with the famous thumb wrestlers of the clan--that most precious pair who are the icons of our clan--have sent images with a demand.  This time the ransom demand has been tripled, up to something they are calling 6 "Dirhams."  To torture us further, they also included the images I've attached, and instructions to drop off the money with one "Joe Able" as soon as possible.  

Warning--the images seem to include elements of torture, with the wrestlers being subjected to some sort of conveyor belt/rack device.  It also appears that they were permitted to make a phone call.  I never received the call, but I suspect their manly skin-tight wrestling panties did not have a sewn in coin pocket.

I will be attempting to contact this "Able" character soon to gain his help in implementing the drop and will let you know if our friends are finally freed.

Randy "friend to the wrestlers"


4 comments:

  1. I am very concerned for the wrestlers, but I feel like this may be just an attempt to record more site visits. That may just be the result of my blog inferiority complex

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  2. I have been discovered! Go ahead, feel inferior!

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  3. I am having a heck of a time finding dirhams. I only need six of the things. You'd think I could find them somewhere!

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  4. You didn't give me a bad time about using Napolean Dynamite to represent Idaho. Could it be because there was an extremely important clue to the wrascally wrestlers whereabouts within.

    ReplyDelete